Why ruin such a good thing? Formerly Zebra Bar and Wine
Bistro, a beloved culinary staple in downtown Medfield for 17 years, owner
Craig Neunecker inexplicably decided to revamp his fine dining eatery into the
playfully named Nosh & Grog Provisions, an unabashed gastropub that the
owner undoubtedly expected would attract a broader segment of customers. Gone
were the formal white tablecloths and famed zebra themed-upholstered chairs,
replaced with more rustic exposed brick walls, industrial artwork, and wooden
light fixtures. Quality food, however, doth not a re-invention make.
Don’t
tell that to the throngs of customers waiting at standing tables and along the
U-shaped bar on a busy Saturday evening (Reservations are not accepted, so
perhaps after witnessing customers waiting for over an hour following a 6 PM
arrival might prompt Neunecker to reconsider that policy). While awaiting our
table, we order poorly executed, small, exorbitantly priced cocktails (at $12
apiece, with several arriving in tiny copper mugs that allow for a mere few
sips), including the Spicy Valentine, a promising blend of chili-infused
tequila that is excessively spicy with seemingly little tequila and zero
balance, a tepid-flavored sangria, and a maple-infused bourbon cider that lays
on the bourbon, but again, packs little
sweet cider flavor as a counterpoint. (My recommendation: order from an
extensive selection of beers that include a Kentucky bourbon-infused ale and a
potent, passionfruit-tinged Finch Chimera IPA). These are ominous precursors to
the meal to come.
White
bean hummus ($8.50) consists of woefully overcooked naan while a white and
chickpea hummus’s offputting flavor is attributed to a heavy-handedness of
basil oil. Jonah crab Rangoon ($12.50) consists of three large, overly-doughy
wedges consisting of a filling dominated more by cream cheese than crab (is it
even there?), whose underlying house duck sauce is all liquid with little
discernible flavor that’s unable to stick to the rangoon’s limp, uncrunchy
exterior (makes me clamor for Chinatown’s much less fussy, smaller, yet far
superior version).
Entrees
are unequivocally disastrous, beginning with Nosh & Grog’s signature OH
S#%T Burger. At $15.75, the burger sounds promising enough, with bacon aioli,
caramelized onions, and mesquite ketchup. The burger, however – small in
stature – arrives grossly overcooked not once, but following a message to the
owner, twice, one initially ordered without cheese arriving with (but with no onions)
and the other with half-melted American cheese and what looks like a sloppy
application of mayo, not bacon aioli. The fries are oversalted and served
lukewarm, accompanied by a small container of ketchup that’s a quarter full. I
sadly yearn for a Big Mac in lieu of what should more aptly be called the
Completely Overpriced, Utterly Mediocre Burger. Another dining companion’s
chicken sandwich is likewise rendered dry, overcooked, and utterly inedible.
The entire meal is comped by the incredulous, apologetic manager, but too
little, too late.
What a
shame. Our party would have been far better served at nearby Avenue, a new,
eight-month-old, contemporary eatery where we decided to grab dessert. A
dreamy, piping hot blondie brownie sundae and double espresso later – along with
an attentive, affable bartender who was the polar opposite of our friendly
enough, yet utterly inattentive waitress who disappeared for long stretches and
left water glasses unfilled – and it almost…ALMOST made up for our forgettable
dining experience minutes earlier. While Nosh & Grog is distinctly a pub,
it’s kitchen’s lack of refinement and execution make the gastro elements of its
new concept both literally and figuratively difficult to swallow. If this
establishment continues to fail in its execution of even the most basic dishes,
it’s path will lead it to a much gloomier Avenue: closure.
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